‘Feminism is Cancer’

I took aim at an anti-equality site yesterday (because that’s really what being anti-feminism is) and I do so again today. This time the site is called ‘Feminism is Cancer‘. The site’s author (FIC, as I don’t know how else to address them) actually posted a comment on my previous article, and I made a few comments on a couple of his. Curiously (or perhaps not so curiously) my comments, and his replies to them, were deleted. Unfortunately I didn’t copy them down – a lesson learned there.

I ought to mention here that, regardless of how much I disagree with the stuff FIC has written, he has been prepared to put it out there.

So what does FIC have to say for himself?

When women stood up for the right to work and vote it had a meaning, what came after it has been disastrous.

The 1960’s was when “modern” feminism was born and all it has left in its path has been ruin and destruction.  First order of chaos?  The 50% divorce rate – and yeah, feminism is directly responsible for it.  Men are biologically wired to be attracted to feminine women (women that act like ladies).  Women are biologically wired to want masculine men.

FIC brought up the divorce rate idea both when he commented on this blog and when I was commenting on his. Needless to say, there are problems with this overly simplistic analysis. He doesn’t provide any proof, beyond ‘feminism!’ When pressed to proof a causal link between feminism and divorce rates, he not only fell silent but it was at that point the comment chain got deleted, and even if we assume he has a point, does it mean what he thinks it means?

If there’s a link between the growth of the feminism movement and divorce rates, why would such a link exist? Is it even remotely as simple as ‘feminism makes women reject men?’ Of course not – in fact that argument is complete rubbish. Instead what we may be looking at is the rejection of marriages that were in some way abusive, with women coming to realise the supposedly acceptable behaviour of their husbands wasn’t in fact, the least bit reasonable. The rejection of pre-determined roles in a marriage might also have been a factor. Finally, there may well be any number of social factors driving divorce rates that feminism has no or little influence on. FIC is making unsupported statements.

We’re also ‘hard-wired’ to be attracted to certain traits. The thing is, we’re not. We’re individuals with rich and varied tastes and ideas and we are all therefore attracted to different qualities. There may be a base truth to the idea that we’re all attracted to certain qualities, but this superficial and not the defining aspect of our relationships with the opposite sex.

Furthermore, this idea traps us into certain pre-defined roles. It traps both men and women into a system that becomes hard to challenge, no matter the harm it causes.

Since the 60’s media has feminized men and masculinized women.  Women, more importantly “feminists” don’t even know this.  They preach, but most are single and miserable for this very reason – their insides tell them they want a real man, but their belief system has them thinking they want a feminized beta male that doesn’t know how to check the oil in his car and spends more time in front of a mirror than she does.

Feminism has done no such thing. It has been – and still is – about equality. It is about freedom of choice and opportunity. It breaks down tired old definitions of what a ‘real man’ and ‘real woman’ really are. It doesn’t fall prey to the idea that we are defined purely by our genders, and must somehow live our lives accordingly.

Men are just as confused, they watch a modern bullshit rom-com produced and directed by a clueless liberal beta male and think that’s how they’re supposed to get the girl, by being more of a woman than she is.  Over pursuing, treating her like a celebrity, showering her with compliments, stalking, treating dates like wedding anniversaries – and then they get angry when she picks the “bad boy” or “the asshole” instead because he’s the masculine one.  The movies always leave that part out and if they do include it, he’s a wife beater, druggie or some other demon.

Oh no, men and women are opening up and being more individual in how they court each other! Men are not assuming every woman wants the same thing – they’re starting to see women as people, and women are no longer enamoured by the gruff, strong-yet-silent stereotype that harms  the image of men as much as it helps (if it helps at all). There are men who are less afraid of their emotions, and women who appreciate that.

So what has this led to in 2016?  Men and women that don’t understand each other, short term fabricated relationships based on looks alone that lead to failure, 50-60% divorce, n0body having kids anymore, 25+ year old millennial virgins that have less sex than their parents that live in said parents basement strapped with 75K in debt for a fake feminist directed degree that has no use.

Blah blah blah. Baseless claims, brought on by a backlash against a misunderstanding of what feminism is.

I know what you’re thinking – how in the hell are feminists responsible for the current college and university mess?  Well, in the 60’s all of those hippies behind feminism couldn’t get regular jobs so they became teachers.  Back when they went to school, taught by the greatest generation, even if it was for an art degree, you’d come out with legit skills – not anymore.

Not only have they systematically destroyed the education system, if you drop down to public school they are also fucking their students on an almost epidemic basis.  Why?  Because the 14 year old boy still runs on biological instinct, he hasn’t been brainwashed by feminism which pushes women away – what they do attracts women.

More baseless claims.

There’s more from this site:

Not just online dating, but dating and relationships in general – but in this case I focus on the digital realm because just like everything else, feminism has destroyed it too.

Its actually the nuclear wasteland of modern feminism.

Millions of men and women that have been pitted against each other by 30-40 years of feminism, and don’t even know the first thing about understanding each other – sending messages back and forth through online meat markets nationwide.

Since feminism has told women to not chase men on their values, accomplishments and merit – it’s become purely a picture and physical attraction game.

This is why the 5’2″ smurf chick demands a guy no shorter than 5’10”, but smurf hasn’t thought about her potential son being blessed with her short gene and being shunned all the same, it’s all about her!  I say potential son in the odd case she gets knocked up and keeps it – her “career” of scheduling meetings is far too important to disrupt by having a child.

Erm, hang on, in his earlier post FIC was saying that women secretly want a masculine, manly man, and feminism is undermining this. Now he’s saying it’s all about physical attraction and not about who the man really is.

The dismissal of women who actually want to have a life beyond being a parent just underscores the total misunderstanding FIC has of feminism and women in general

(He posts a picture now of a woman performing oral sex on a man, with the tagline ‘how it used to be’. I won’t reproduce that picture here, but this speaks volumes to the objectification of women FIC actually desires)

Men can’t get by on looks alone either!  Nope, that first message you send her better be Hunter S Thompson quality or you can fuck off!

Ok, ok – so you’re a good looking guy that has the ability to intrigue with words – good.  Now you can get dates, but you aren’t out of the woods yet.  Online date sites are filled with angry, clueless and miserable feminists that ultimately hate men and they “don’t even know why” they signed up.  As I posted before, their insides crave masculinity, but their belief system has an agenda here.

Women, no matter how hard they try are still extremely emotional beings that will cry if it rains out or the wind blows the wrong way, so many delete their accounts when a guy stops responding or doesn’t call her again after one date – too much to handle!  But the hundreds of messages, likes and winks from others can keep most going by inflating their ego, as well as their standards in the process.

It’s a good thing that we can’t get by purely on looks! It’s a good thing that we should be expected to demonstrate we can hold intelligent and meaningful conversations with someone we might be looking to share our lives with! Men will send unsolicited dick pics to women on dating sites, Facebook and Twitter, and then wonder why their bravado is not rewarded. Guess what? Women value men who can use words that are more than two syllables long.

His final paragraph suggests to me FIC is blowing hot air. I can only wonder as to what role his own experiences with women have led him to reach his conclusions.

Taken from the comments section of this post:

Women are not leaders – they fail and cause a huge mess when handed control. Look at Germany or beta males that “lead” other western countries. Too emotional and easily swayed. ALPHA MEN need to stand up and re-take control – you are seeing this right now with Trump. Last stop to bring back order and control to this feminist madness.

Since Germany is actually one of the best-performing economies in Europe right now, I have to wonder by what definition FIC is judging the success of a nation. FICs support from Trump… well, that says it all.

29 thoughts on “‘Feminism is Cancer’

  1. Ha ha ha my favourite part is where he’s like, ‘Everyone’s having less sex and there’s 25 year old virgins’.
    Kind of explains what he’s pissed about. He’s either a virgin and blaming women for it, or no one’s having sex with him, and he’s still blaming women for it.
    He’s like a less violent Eliot Rodgers – blaming everyone else instead of looking at himself as to why no one wants to be with him.
    I think the answer is in his writing.

    Liked by 4 people

  2. I read this whole thing and I am very intrigued. Are you certain that FIC is a man? I understand why we would think that, but read this as if it is a Woman. Makes it more interesting. I am not sure if I just overlooked it, but I didn’t see anything identifying the gender of the person writing.
    This post is crazy. And whereas, I can see the point in some of the things….I certainly do not think that feminism is to blame for all the wrong in marriage. And if it is, well then count me guilty 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’ll admit it’s an assumption that FIC is a man, but it’s based on their writing. He’s taken his version of feminism (and his concepts of masculinity and feminity) and argued from there, instead of attempting to understand what feminism actually is.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. i think this gives him away, “Women are biologically wired to want masculine men … 25+ year old millennial virgins that have less sex than their parents … Since feminism has told women to not chase men on their values, accomplishments and merit – it’s become purely a picture and physical attraction game.” must be some puny thing that has not had much luck with women, and thinks it’s stature rather than charisma and sensitivity women want. but what is really intriguing is his comment, “Women are not leaders – they fail and cause a huge mess when handed control.” this is not just bigotry, it’s sheer ignorance. is this fellow following current trends in politics? has he been following events in Germany? doesn’t he see a pattern – how women have come in in various countries and cleaned up the mess men left behind? how can a man not appreciate the leadership qualities of women like Golda Meir, Isabel Martinez de Peron, Angela Merkel, Dilma Rousseff, Nicola Sturgeon, Park Geun Hye, Johanna Sigurdardottir, Ellen Johnson Sirleaf, Sonia Gandhi or Benazir Bhutto? is he watching the fallout of Brexit, and the political nous of Theresa May? does he appreciate a man like Donald Trump? somehow i feel this has nothing to do with feminism but a deep personal grudge against women who have put him down for his bigoted views and sorry approach to women.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’m with Sharon! That person is somehow so emotionally/intellectually depraved that they actually believe this stuff. So sad, and so dangerous. Really what people like this are is afraid, and totally identified with their mind and what they know. The unknown scares them. At the same time, they know certain things to be true (like the fact that all men have “feminine” qualities, and the man that wrote this certainly does buried deep somewhere) and for whatever reason this causes them to feel shame and so they go into denial and attack people that remind them of that trait.

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Much like Trump, FiC has nothing but assumptions & hot air. He/she offers no explanation or facts because there are none.

    While it’s true that we can’t identify whether or not FiC identifies as male or female, there are some indications FiC might be male. First, (I read this in an article a while ago; I don’t know that I could find it or even think of the author’s name at this point) females tend to use more pronouns in their writing. Second, the references to “beta males” & the (wildly inaccurate) assumption that women all want “masculine men” are plays straight out of the MRA playbook. MRAs are typically male; however, there are some female members who have swallowed their poisoned Kool-aid. Still, that mindset typically helps men over women (especially since they don’t have to do any work to question how they act, how they treat people, & how society is telling them to be “men”).

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I can’t imagine that people like FIC still exist……and yet, the truth is that I’ve met several of them over my lifetime of being associated with Conservative Christians. Boy am I ever glad I’m a Liberal Christian. As for the divorce rate – seriously, blaming feminists? How about putting the blame where it belongs – on the breakdown of the marriage itself. My guess would be that women aren’t putting up with as much BS as they were before they were encouraged to support themselves.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I don’t want to believe they exist either, but the proof is so overwhelming it’s kinda hard to not believe. Maybe they’re simply more vocal than the level-headed people, but it seems like they’re everywhereeee.

      Like

    2. His use of a graphic image sums up his attitude toward women – and with women not prepared to be treated as objects and expecting to be treated like human beings… as you say, women aren’t tolerating such behaviour, and indeed, why should they?

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Youch! I couldn’t get through all of it! I’m at a loss for words. Seriously! I don’t know how you managed to read all of it, communicate with this individual (multiple times), and address it bit by bit here on your blog. Kudos to you!

    PS. When I read the title of your post, I did a double take. So glad you were addressing FIC’s position (as opposed to upholding it as your own!) Lol 😛

    Liked by 2 people

    1. QuirkyGrasshopper – I’ve said almost the exact same thing to DarthTimon before!

      I think he’s really onto something, though; a lot of these people, I’ve found, get even more riled up when one talks with them calmly.

      Personally, I’ve taken it a step further. I’ve talked to them politely & with compassion, but refuting their points all the same. When I force them to see a person on the other side, they tend to … IDK, flinch. Either way, I feel better for approaching the matter calmly.

      That said, even I wouldn’t dip my toe where DarthTimon wades in!

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Yeah, I know what you mean. It’s easier said than done, but I guess it is important to try. In that sense, asking the question, ‘why’, is sometimes effective. You’re asking people to introspect and dig a little deeper.

        Liked by 2 people

      2. I agree – it’s important to try.

        My thoughts on asking “why” are complicated. I learned, in a couple of conflict resolution course I took in H.S. & college, that asking “why” often makes people feel defensive. It’s almost like one half of a question, “why don’t you do things the way I want you to.”

        I could go into more detail, but I can’t recall it all off the top of my head at the moment.

        However, that doesn’t mean we can’t rephrase the question to make it sound less aggressive. Telling people how you feel, then asking what they think encourages a certain behavior or opinion could work – but, with the Internet, there’s just no knowing how people will react.

        Liked by 2 people

  7. I guess that makes sense. I’d love to try a less provocative/aggressive version of why. I’m still figuring this out, honestly. I’m not very good at having these super intense discussions. I get so caught up in how strongly I feel about something, that I sometimes just find it easier to just avoid the discussion altogether. Which is a short term way of coping.

    Yeah, the internet is a whole other ball game in itself.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. UGH. I was hoping to find an article or something expressing the whole “why” issue better than I’m doing right now, but, apparently, I’m not searching correctly.

      I really hope I have one or more of my conflict resolution books somewhere in case I want to write about this topic some day! 😦

      The issue, I think, with using “why” is that it can make people feel like they’re being judged. It’s important in disagreements to keep from assuming the other person’s/people’s character, opinion, or life.

      It’s OK not to be “OK” with super intense discussions! When these subjects are deeply personal, it can feel like we’re being attacked – not that they’re disagree with our opinion. It feels like they’re disagreeing with us, our existence.

      As for how you’re coping, if it’s an online coping mechanism, that’s completely fine. You don’t owe anyone online your time or conversation. If it’s in your real life or with close friends & family, that might be a different issue.

      Regardless, it’s OK to take time to process & step back if you feel like a conversation or situation is getting too heated! Not listening to your inner voice can be bad for your mental & emotional health, which doesn’t help any situation.

      But, hey, maybe one day you’ll get old & cynical like me. LOL 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Thank you so much for your replies. I really appreciate it 🙂
    I think I see what you mean about ‘ why’ making people feel defensive. I would like to encourage people to do a little reflection from time to time – that includes me too. I should think about how to do that without getting them defensive and without getting quite so riled up as well. It does sometimes feel personal somehow.
    I guess I’m not always comfortable with conflict. And somehow disagreeing feels like that. Which is why, depending on the context, I tend to avoid it. I have a friend, for instance, who I’m very fond of. We don’t see eye to eye on a lot of stuff ideologically. The few times we did have discussions rattled me more, I think. I’ve mostly avoided those topics with her, just because we have so much else we enjoy talking about.

    Lol 😛 My cynicism ebs and flows. I have pockets of time where I’m honestly write fed up with the world, and times when I feel quite hopeful and optimistic.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you for being patient with my responses! Ask Darthtimon – I do sometimes take a while to reply, but I do my best to get to every comment conversation. 🙂

      What helps me in situations where I’m feeling defensive, or I think I’m going to say something that would make another person defensive, is to come from a place of empathy. To put myself into the other person’s position, to wonder how I would feel hearing someone say something similar to me. That helps me to word things more tactfully, I think.

      It’s not a perfect system by any means. But, I do think it’s important to remember that others feel about their positions as personally & powerfully as we do. We might think they’re wrong, but it doesn’t make their feelings any less valid.

      I think of “disagreeing” & “conflict” on different levels, personally. That doesn’t mean you seeing “disagreement” as “conflict” is wrong. Still, I think I can talk to people & feel comfortable “agreeing to disagree” – to me, that means we’ve reached a point where we won’t convince the either of our position as “correct,” but that we recognize the validity of the others’ position, even if we don’t hold it as “correct.”

      It’s OK to find conflict uncomfortable. I think it’s supposed to be uncomfortable. It’s also normal to feel disagreements are more painful when they’re had with people we care about. If your relationship with your friend works best if you avoid certain topics, then that’s great! You can see the person beyond their opinion on some topics that are very near & dear to you – which can help with empathizing in the future.

      Sometimes, despite how it feels, disagreeing with someone you care about can also be a good situation. You can discuss the topics – if you both feel comfortable about it at some point – but detach the person’s opinion from them. I hope that makes some sense. You can learn about why they feel that way, what emotions they feel about it, what shapes their opinions. It can help you see things from another person’s perspective when you care about the person’s perspective.

      But, that doesn’t mean you have to talk about sensitive topics with this – or any – friend. You might want to consider poking your toes outside of your comfort zone (because they say that’s how we grow, although I don’t know precisely who “they” are), but you don’t have to go at anyone’s speed but your own.

      I think it’s important to address conflicts, whether they’re political/social opinions, or feeling slighted by a friend. Otherwise, resentment builds or people become passive-aggressive.

      I have a dear friend too, with whom I have conflict-related issues – she is a serious people-pleaser. She doesn’t like to say “no” or disagree. Well, when we have disagreements, that can cause some real issues. I like to get to the bottom of the conflict, find out what each of us said/did & how it made the other feel, so we can move past it. She doesn’t like to address it. This leads to resentment sometimes. She has gotten much better in addressing issues over the year, possibly due to my constant nagging! 😊

      Liked by 2 people

  9. I’m sorry if what I wrote was overwhelming, or just too long. I do hope you find something possibly helpful or thought-provoking (in a good way).

    If you’d like to comment later, that’s great. Or, if you’d prefer, we can exchange email addresses?

    Regardless of future communication, I really enjoyed chatting with you! You’ve given me a lot to think about (in a good way, of course!) too. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. If you want to comment back here, by all means do! I’m sure DarthTimon won’t mind. 😉

      If you’d prefer email, feel free to drop me a line at writingradiation @ gmail .com (no spaces – I only did the spaces in case WordPress gets a bug up its butt, as it does sometimes. 😉 )

      Liked by 2 people

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